HOW IT WORKS

TapeJesus is a voice-powered imperial fraction calculator built for carpenters, tradespeople, and DIYers.

Tap the mic. Speak your measurements. Tape Jesus does the math. Keep your gloves on.

CALCULATE

Tap the red mic and speak any measurement math — addition, subtraction, multiplication, division. Tape Jesus gives you the answer instantly in fractions down to 1/16 of an inch. The result shows on the visual tape measure so you can see exactly where to mark.

Example: "Nine and a quarter plus two and an eighth" → 11 3/8"

CUT LIST

Tap the yellow mic and read off your measurements one at a time. Tape Jesus logs every cut. No writing. No pencil. No paper blowing off the sawhorse. Tap any cut to mark it done. Tap again to undo.

LEARN

Can't read a tape measure? No shame. Tape Jesus teaches you quarters, eighths, and sixteenths with visual guides and practice rounds. Start with the big lines. Work your way down.

THE GAME

Think you're Tape Jesus? Prove it. Five difficulty levels from Green Thumb to Tape Jesus. Ten questions per round. Timed. Ranked. Share your score with Black Tape Jesus holding your results.

WHO IS TAPE JESUS?

Tape Jesus is a 2,026-year-old divine carpenter with over two millennia of jobsite experience. He measured the pyramids. He set the radius at Stonehenge. He taught Noah what a cubit was. Now he does your fraction math so you can keep your gloves on.

FAQ

Q: Is TapeJesus free?
A: Yes. The calculator, cut list, learn mode, and game are all free.

Q: Do I need an account?
A: No. No signup. No login. Just tap and talk.

Q: Why voice?
A: Because your hands are full. You're holding a board, a tape, a pencil. You can't type on a phone with work gloves on. Tape Jesus listens so you don't have to put anything down.

Q: Does it work offline?
A: The calculator and cut list need an internet connection for voice processing. The learn mode and game work offline.

Q: What about my privacy?
A: TapeJesus does not store your voice recordings. Your audio is processed in real time and discarded. See our Privacy Policy for details.